Mom Life is the Best Life

mom life is the best life

Earlier this week my daughter, June heard me say that “mom life is the best life”, and she asked, “what’s mom life, mommy?” Ah my child… where do I begin…

Mom life is beautiful, joyful, messy, and unfiltered.

Right now, for me, in this season of life, mom life is waking up early to start my day with a few precious minutes of alone time, even though I’d rather be sleeping in.

It’s mornings spent at story time, the park, or at play dates.

It’s meeting a friend and her kids for lunch, and realizing that you barely finished a full sentence in between encouraging your kids to eat and making sure no one catapulted out of their booster seat.

It’s craving a quiet afternoon but constantly catering to requests for more toys, stories, and snacks.

It’s being in constant awe of how big you’re getting, how much you’re changing, and how much independence you’re developing.

It’s knowing that even though I think you’re so big right now, a year from now I’ll look back and realize how little you were.

Mom life is constant nostalgia.

It’s counting down the minutes until daddy gets home, not just for the extra set of hands (although those matter too!), but for the moments the three of us get to share together, our own little team.

Mom life is wondering why a little person that’s so tired fights so hard to stay awake, when I myself would love nothing more than to crawl into bed each evening.

And then, mom life, ironically, is me fighting to stay awake every night after you go to bed so that your dad and I can have some alone time, which we so desperately need.

Mom life is me realizing that although all I’ve just said makes mom life sound a bit like a drag, it’s really the sweetest, most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.

Mom life is knowing that the priceless memories we’re making matter so much more than a full night’s sleep, days of peace and quiet, and uninterrupted meals.

Mom life is the most unconditional love and the purest joy you can imagine.

Mom life is a blessing.

Mom life is a gift.

Mom life is the best life.


What is your definition of mom life? We are each at different stages of our motherhood journeys and all have our own unique, personal experiences of mom life. Maybe you are an expecting mom, or maybe your children are already grown. Maybe you mother your grandchildren or your nieces and nephews. Maybe you are not a mother to your own child, but you are a teacher caring for students each day. Perhaps you have birthed a business, a book, a garden, or a new home. We are all mothers caring for the people and things we love.

What does mom life mean to you? Please share in the comments below! I would love to start an open conversation about this. I think it will be beautiful to read about the different experiences of mom life, and see that even though each experience is different, we are all on this beautiful journey together.

May you love your mom life each and every day (even the hard ones).

Be well,
Ambar

Why Alone Time is Necessary For Moms

Why Moms Need Alone Time

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Once you become a mom, alone time can be hard to come by… and ironically, as moms, we need our alone time more than ever.

As mothers, being busy comes with the territory. We are constantly chasing after our little humans, entertaining them, playing with them, caring for them, and keeping them alive. With so much of our time being spent caring for our babies, it’s no wonder that we’re exhausted at the end of the day.

Our children are adorable and precious. But they are also exuberant, loud, energetic, and needy. They are very dependent on us, and because of that, much of our time is spent giving.

When all of our time is spent giving, we get out of balance, and start to feel stressed and overwhelmed. Life is meant to be a natural give and take; when that isn’t happening, we are out of balance.

That’s where alone time comes in. Alone time is the gift we give ourselves. It helps even out the score so that we can get back into balance. Here are 3 reasons why alone time is so necessary for mothers, especially for mothers of young children:

Silence is Golden

I have heard it said that mothers of young children need to spend time in silence because so much of our time is consumed by noise and chaos. Could this be any more true? When most of our time is spent with our little ones, it’s very easy to become overstimulated. Having some peace and quiet helps us to relax and rejuvenate.

Self Care is Needed

Alone time qualifies as self care time. Self care doesn’t have to mean a trip to the spa. Spending a half hour reading a book or going for a walk are also ways to practice self care. We’ve all heard the expression ‘you can’t fill from an empty cup”. Taking some self care time helps balance the scales. If we are not taking good care of ourselves, the quality of care that we give to our children suffers. When we are rested and feeling good, we are better able to enjoy spending quality time with our little ones, and have a better attitude while caring for them. Taking some much needed time to ourselves allows us to recalibrate.

Tune in to Your Desires

Having space and time to ourselves helps us quiet our minds and become reacquainted with ourselves. When we are still, we are better able to connect with our inner wisdom. Have you ever noticed that you get your best ideas in the shower? That’s because it’s a quiet time when you are completely focused on yourself. Taking some alone time can have a similar effect.

As you can see, having alone time is absolutely crucial and necessary to our well being as mothers. Even a few moments spread out throughout the day can make a major difference.

Here are some ideas for incorporating more alone time into your day:

  1. Wake up before your children. Use this morning time to do some sun salutations, journal, or simply sip a cup of coffee in peace.
  2. Take mental health breaks throughout the day. Find a few moments when your children are entertained, step into another room, and do some deep breathing.
  3. Make showering and bathing a spa experience. Use some special bath salts or shower gel and use this time to intentionally unwind.
  4. Make meals a sacred time. Shut down electronics, use your good china, sit down and enjoy every meal.
  5. Enforce nap time or quiet time. If your children are still young enough to nap, take advantage of this quiet time to enjoy some self care time to yourself.
  6. Use your support system. Incorporate some time into your week where you can lean on your support system to help with your children so that you can get some time to yourself. Have your partner take your kids in the morning so that you can rest, ask your babysitter to stay for an extra hour, or drop the kids off for a playdate with friends. Take inventory of your resources and use them regularly so that you can get a break.
  7. Create an evening ritual. Take some time to wind down before bed by diffusing some essential oils, reading an inspiring book, or doing an evening meditation. Use this time to unwind.
  8. Make sleep a non-negotiable. It can be tempting to stay up late watching Netflix, but that’s not always the best use of your alone time. Try your best to shut down electronics a half an hour before bed and go to sleep at a decent time so that you can feel rested enough to wake up before your kids and follow these tips all over again every day! 🙂

I hope that you’ve started to see the value of getting some time to yourself each and every day. What’s the biggest challenge you face with incorporating alone time into your daily routine? Let me know in the comments below! I would love to help you work through this.

Have a beautiful week and enjoy some quality time with yourself!

Be well,
Ambar

P.S. If you would like some personalized help with incorporating some more alone time into your life, I invite you to check out my Private Coaching + Support packages for moms! It would be my honor to guide you in getting some more time to yourself and creating your ideal mom life!

 

Why Connecting to your Pre-Baby Self is the Key to Being a Fulfilled Mom

Connecting to your Pre-Mom Self

Let me ask you a question: how do you feel in your everyday life?

Right now, much of my life is consumed by being a stay at home mom. If I’m honest with myself, most days I feel really happy and fulfilled, but I also feel tired, overwhelmed, and frumpy at times. But I think I’m figuring out the key to changing that…

Last night, I was on the way to a family party. My husband was driving and our daughter was asleep in the backseat. We started listening to a playlist of songs from 2008 when we first started dating. We were having so much fun singing and reminiscing, and by the time we got to the party, I was feeling fun, carefree, and sexy… I almost forgot that I had a sleeping toddler in the backseat.

I don’t always feel fun, carefree, and sexy in my everyday life. I tend to get caught up in all of the responsibilities of motherhood and its constant demands, and forget about connecting to those parts of myself. But listening to this music brought me back to a time when those feelings were the norm. Music has the power to transform us and lets us travel back to specific eras in our lives.

Why connecting to your pre-mom self is the key to being a more fulfilled mom

This experience made me remember the importance of staying connected to ALL parts of myself. It helped me realize my desire to stay connected to the young and carefree part of myself; the part of me that liked to go out dancing instead of going to sleep by 10pm, the part of me that stayed up all night talking to friends on the phone, the part of me that was more concerned with having fun in the moment than in worrying about the future.

This pre-baby part of me is still with me underneath all of my daily routines and responsibilities. And she wants to be acknowledged too.

What parts of your pre-mom life do you miss? How can you acknowledge the old parts of you that want to come out and play?

If you were an avid runner, you can go for a jog around the block.

If you loved going clubbing with your girlfriends, you can plan a girls’ night out.

If you liked fashion, you can buy yourself a new outfit.

If you enjoyed romantic dinners, you can get a babysitter and plan a special evening with your husband.

If you loved traveling, you can plan a day trip and go on an adventure.

As mothers of young children, it can be really easy to get caught up in the daily routine and forget to make an effort to nurture these parts of ourselves. But it is so important to remember that although mothering may be the major focus of our lives in this season, it is not all that we are.

connect to your pre-baby self

Connecting with our pre-mom selves reminds us that we are WHOLE people with individual needs, wants, and desires. It is easy to forget that amidst all of the responsibilities of motherhood. But when we start to check in with ourselves and acknowledge ALL parts of our unique selves, life becomes a lot more fun.

Is this something that you struggle with? What parts of your pre-mom self do you miss most? What small steps can you take to bring them back into your life? I would love to hear in the comments below!

Wishing you a week of fun and fulfillment!

Be well,
Ambar

 

5 Ways to Celebrate your Freedom this Independence Day

5 Ways to Embrace your Freedom this Independence Day

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi friends! This weekend we are celebrating Independence Day in the United States. As a married mother to a toddler, the words “independence” and “freedom” might not be the first thing that comes to mind to describe my lifestyle. But the truth is that I have never felt more free. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that freedom is less about being able to fly by the seat of my pants, and more about being intentional and recognizing that I have a choice in the way that I choose to life my life.

By living my life in the ways that feel good to me, I am able to embrace freedom like never before.

Here are 5 ways that you can celebrate your freedom this weekend!

1. Choose Joy

This might sound a little bit cheesy, but the first step to celebrating your freedom is recognizing that you always have the choice to decide how you want to feel. No matter what is going on around you, you can choose to focus on joy.

So for example, say that it’s early in the morning and your toddler starts having a meltdown before even making it through breakfast. You can use that as an excuse to let the rest of your day spiral downhill. Or, you can decide to choose joy instead. Maybe your child needs a little fresh air, so you might decide to bring your breakfast outside and then play for a few moments. The change in scenery might be the exact perspective change you needed to choose joy instead of chaos.

Remember that there is always a choice to be made, and try to choose joy as often as you can.

2. Create White Space in your Calendar

Creating white space in your calendar simply means having certain blocks of time where you don’t have anything planned. When your schedule is filled to the brim, you can quickly start to feel overwhelmed by all of your activities and feel like you’ve lost your freedom. Creating white space in your calendar leaves you time to relax, be spontaneous, and go with the flow. This creates the feeling of freedom!

3. Do What You Love

Long weekends are the perfect excuse to make time for doing more of what you love. Whether it’s going swimming, going shopping and taking advantage of some good sales, or taking a nap on your couch, focus on doing what you love this weekend and you will feel even more free!

4. Be With Your Loved Ones

Freedom is nothing without love. Having freedom can be lonely if you don’t have anyone to spend your time with. On this holiday weekend, carve out some time to create special memories with your loved ones. Go to parties, plan some adventures, and have fun!

5. Take Time to Unplug

Electronics can quickly suck up our time and freedom. Being on our phones all day can be a huge distraction from the freedom we are trying to celebrate! We are not free when we are attached to the cyber world. Take some time this weekend to unplug and be fully present with those you love while doing the things you love. Have some screen-free family time, go outside and enjoy being out in the real world instead of focused on what’s happening on social media. By resisting the urge to check your phone, you will feel even more free than ever before.

I hope that you find these ideas helpful! Which of these will you be trying this weekend? I am going to focus extra hard on unplugging from my phone and enjoying extra family time with Angelo and June.

Happy 4th of July friends! Celebrate your freedom and embrace all of the love in your life.

Be well,
Ambar

3 Keys to Being a Happy Mama

How to Be a Happy Mama

 

For as long as I can remember, if you asked me what I wanted most out of life, my answer would be “to be happy”. After struggling with anxiety and depression for most of my adolescence and young adulthood, happiness became my ultimate goal. I worked hard to achieve happiness, and I am proud to say that I figured out how to become one of the happiest people I know.

Motherhood has brought a new level of joy to my life. It has filled me with a sense of purpose; an inner knowing that being a mother is what I was brought here to do. But learning to be a happy mother, also took some work. With my program for new moms, New Mama Bird Circle, starting this week, I’ve been reflecting on my experience as a mother thus far. I’ve realized that I can sum up what it takes to be a happy mama in 3 words: Contemplation, Connection, & Contribution.

Contemplation

Contemplation refers to time spent alone in stillness. Time spent in contemplation can include prayer and/or meditation. The most important part, is that it is time spent by ourselves, with our own inner wisdom. As mothers, our lives are noisy and busy. There is a constant hustle and bustle to our days. In order for us to be in balance, we need to make a commitment to having quiet time in our lives. This gives us an opportunity to get in touch with our own desires, hopes, and dreams. It gives us space to reflect on what’s working for us, and on what’s not. It helps us relieve stress, and have time to be alone with our thoughts, without thinking about anyone else’s expectations of us. Time spent in quiet stillness and contemplation is important for everyone, and it is especially vital to us mothers.

Connection

As much as alone time is important for us, so is Connection. As humans, we desire deep connection. We all want to feel loved, supported, and cared for. As mothers, we are natural givers. We need to feel loving connection in our lives, and experience relationships that go both ways, where there is an equal give and take. Since we are always giving our energy away, we need to also be able to receive love from those around us. In order to feel our best, we need strong connections with our families and communities. We experience connection by finding our tribes; the friends who become family and will love us and encourage us through any challenges. We also experience connection by being fully present with our families, by putting our phones away, being in the moment, and allowing ourselves to feel the love we have for these special people in our lives. By being with the people we love, who also love us, and accept us exactly as we are, we experience fulfilling connection in our lives.

Contribution

Contribution is the final key to happiness for us mamas. In order to feel happy and fulfilled, we need to feel that we are contributing something of value to the world. We all want to know that our lives have made an impact, whether that be by the specific ways in which we raise our children, the work we do in the world, or a combination of both. We need to be doing meaningful work with our lives, contributing to the things and people that matter to us, and being intentional about the legacies that we will leave behind.

Contemplation, connection, and contribution are the keys to a happy life as a mama. Once these 3 values are met, joy comes naturally. The great thing about this, is that these 3 things are all within our control. How we spend our days, is how we spend our lives. By taking small steps each day to spend time in contemplation, value our connections, and contribute to what matters to us, we will be well on our way to being happy, fulfilled moms.

We will be discussing these topics at length, and creating our own daily self care routines to make sure that these values are being met, in New Mama Bird Circle, my virtual program for new moms. If you are a new mama who could use some extra support in this area, I invite you to join us! We would love to connect with you and help you feel like the happy and healthy mama that you deserve to be.