What I learned from my daughter’s birth

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My daughter June turned one last week, and it has had me reminiscing about the last year and reflecting back on her entrance into this world. This has been the most amazing, life altering, difficult, and precious year of my life, and it all started with June’s birth. June Joy Gingerelli came into the world on June 17, 2015, after 3 days of labor and an emergency C-section. I had been a good yogi; I did prenatal yoga, took hypnobirthing classes, and listened to meditations preparing myself to give birth. Needless to say, this is not how I had envisioned things would go.

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But, my labor and delivery experience taught me 3 key lessons that have helped shape my first year of mothering. I share them in hopes that there is some truth in here for you too.

1. It’s not always about me. 

I had made June’s birth completely about me; how I wanted things to go, and how I wanted her to enter the world. When I didn’t get what I wanted, it was a hard blow. It has helped me immensely to realize that this was June’s birth story, not mine. I firmly believe that from the moment we are born, we come into this world to learn certain lessons. My daughter entered this world on her own time, in the way that would best serve her, and I have to be okay with that. It’s not about me, it’s about her.

2. We don’t always get what we want, but we always get what we need.

Having an emergency C-section was my worst case scenario. But when I look back on how much I learned from it, I can see that I got the exact experience that I needed. I was brought into the world of motherhood with the knowledge that I am strong enough to handle difficult situations. I can face my worst circumstances head on, and learn the lessons that they are there to provide me with. From my very first moments of motherhood, I learned that I was no longer in control, and that by surrendering to the lack of control, I make space for what is.

3. Our biggest challenges lead to our biggest rewards.

My labor was long and intense. I spent hours thinking I couldn’t do this anymore, and wondering what I had gotten myself into. Now that I’ve had the incredible, indescribable experience of witnessing my sweet daughter this past year, I look back and think, “Oh my God. I would have done that 10 times over in order to have this precious child.” I thought it was so difficult at the time, but the labor itself seems so trivial in comparison to the countless joys I’ve experienced through the gift of being a mama this year.

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So, I invite you to think about how you can apply these lessons in your own life. In what ways are you taking responsibility for someone else’s story? And how can you let that go today? Is there an area in your life where you are pushing to have things work out a certain way? Can you trust that maybe you are being lead in a different direction for your own good? What challenges are you facing right now? And what rewards might be in store for you as a result?

I hope this is helpful to you.

Be well,
Ambar

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